Gay rights and Larry King

I just finished reading a very sad story in this weeks' Newsweek on a junior high boy who was shot point blank by another student in Oxnard, California. Larry King was a teenager who had determined that he was gay, or at least bisexual, and was wearing woman's clothing- he had an affinity for shoes- as well as wearing makeup and lipstick to school. His behavior had caused disruptions around the school- kids made fun of him both in and out of classes, he made garish statements both in and out of classrooms to students and staff, and even had to be moved to another school.

Before Valentine's Day 2008 he and a group of his girlfriends were playing the typical teenage game of truth or dare, only this time the dare was to identify one that each had a crush on, and walk up to that person on the playground as ask them to be their Valentine. He strode up to Brandon McInerney, someone he reportedly had stated he liked before, while Brandon was playing basketball with his friends, and asked him to be his Valentine. Brandon had previously dealt with Larry and made it clear he was not gay, but was immediately teased by his friends, clearly causing him to be upset.

Shortly afterwards, Brandon was heard by one of Larry's friends in the hallways at school saying "You'd better say goodbye to Larry, he won't be around much longer." Two days later in English class, Brandon gets out of his seat behind Larry, pulls out a handgun he smuggled into class, and shoots Larry twice in the head before walking out of class. He was apprehended shortly thereafter. Larry died in the hospital two days after that, suffering a massive stroke.

Now, I remember junior high being very difficult, for this is when everyone is trying to find out their identity and who they are. I was bullied oftentimes, and until I stood up to the biggest bully, I was subject to constant punching, pinching, and kicking, all of which were done behind a teacher's back so the bully was never caught. I remember slamming Gary into the wall in the locker room after being physically bullied once again, telling him to "Stop, or else", before I was able to bring it under control. Fortunately I grew about 6 inches and soon was much taller than he was, so my threat finally had some teeth.

But what about Brandon? Surely there is no excuse for his act. I don't care how bad the bullying, there is no excuse for the taking of one's life. But can you imagine the psychological toll this took on him? The questions that went through his head about his own sexuality, something he may have not been ready to deal with developmentally? What about the obvious anger that it created? While the turmoil has been made of Brandon's shooting of Larry, how was Brandon supposed to tolerate the harassment Larry was subjecting him to? I don't remember from my days in junior high of having much logic, sensitivity, and empathy such that I could have pulled Larry aside and say, "Look here, what you are doing is making me uncomfortable, and I do not like it, please stop." The thought of that adult-like response, though clearly morally acceptable and honorable, is asinine for a 14 year old. Plus, there clearly is not a way to object without being called a homophile, bigot, or closed minded, regardless of how it was handled. If he would have struck him, it would have been viewed the same way- though not to the same degree- as violence against a homosexual.

Here is my point- there was a staff email that was sent out about allowing a "student who has chosen to express his alternative sexuality" to do so unless it caused a disruption in the classroom. Why was he not brought in to explain that expressing his sexuality in his ostentatious way may not be the best for the school, both for students who were not ready to handle this big step into adolescence and for teachers who have to control these hormone crazy children everyday. I know kids are sent home for wearing clothing that is deemed "disruptive" for being the wrong color, so why was he allowed to wear stiletto heels or pink boots or makeup at school? Have we become so fearful of what the gay community calls "acceptance", especially in light of California's recent approval of gay marriage, that doing the right thing by controlling his outward display of sexuality would be considered discrimination? I can bet that if it was a girl who developed her breasts at a young age and was wearing outfits clearly displaying her cleavage she would have been forced to change.

But not Larry. And now he is dead.